Are you healing? It’s okay to take your time

I have spent the last four years ‘healing’. I did not have a physical illness – although mental health issues are no different than physical illness. I had mental health issues. These mental health issues are plaguing our society, sadly with increasing suicide rates and stress and anxiety on the rise. LinkedIn shared last week how people are ‘ghosting’ interviews and even job offers, I do not know anyone who does not have their struggles. Please, can we start talking about it openly?

Four years ago I accepted that my inauthentic life had led me to be very unhappy. Depression and anxiety coupled with dark negative thoughts – you name it, I had it. I scrambled around, desperate to ‘fix’ myself but not really realising I was in a bad way.

But there was light at the end of the tunnel as I recognised these feelings, I knew they would make me physically ill in the end, and I knew I had to deal with them.

Self-medicating came as the first ‘port of call’.  Lots of partying (which is fine, I still do that) but plied with oodles of gin and prosecco, accompanied by mad bouts of clothes shopping. Fun of course, but ultimately not the greatest way to treat your body on a regular basis and not great for your bank balance either!

So I started to invest a lot of time (and yes money) in my own healing. Firstly, I started with books (the love of my life) – The Power and The Secret by Rhonda Byrne were the first. They were my foundations… could there really be a different way of life out there? I then explored all forms of therapies from spiritual mentoring (I’m an executive spiritual person – grounded, after all, we’re human and this is our life) through to proper counselling, Unleash the Power by Tony Robbins, Landmark Forum, to NLP transformational coaching, CBT and Hypnotherapy. Yes, I threw the book at myself. When was I going to stop this endless chit chat in my head – it was killing me? Up one week, down the next, it was intolerable and unbearable and did nothing for me.


After four years, I now write to you on the 1st of July 2018 and say to you this, with all my heart “I’m healed”. I now know myself, what happened in my life, I’m full of love and forgiveness both for others and myself and I’m truly ‘shining’ inside and out (and long may it continue!). And what’s even better? I can help others now, knowing I’m strong.


However, I’m going to be honest. It’s not been easy and you have to want to heal which means lots of effort and hard work. This is not a quick fix plan and there is not one out there. I’ve literally spent every day since July 2014 ‘healing’ and it’s only now that I’ve finally found the peace I’ve been seeking. So let me share with you here my top twenty tips for healing your mind, body and soul.


1. Accept that you are healing and embrace any therapy that you think will work for you. As for myself, Natasha Carlton-Dewhirst has been the catalyst for my change. She can be found at @NatashaRTTC but there are many healing modalities out there. You have to work with what works for you and of course and have some funds. Not everyone has the funds to support this kind of investment. YouTube has some amazing inspirational speakers and it’s free. Look out for ‘free’ workshops – The Soul Project is amazing, Stephanie shares posts every day – even a free Facebook post can help – it truly can and Stephanie played a big part in my transformation with CBT sessions.
2. Talk nicely to yourself.
3. Walk in the fresh air and enjoy the sun.
4. Cut down on the booze, exercise and sleep well.
4. Be grateful every day for as much as you can.
5. Listen to Meditation CDs, or like me, have Eckhart Tolle talk to you on YouTube every morning (other spiritual people are available) – he’s more psychologist then spiritual – very Landmark.  I also love music – uplifting ‘house’ music as it happens, it makes me smile. But choose your ‘genre’ the one that puts a smile on your face but please do be wary of ‘sad’ songs – I do believe they can make you ‘sadder’. Why? Because if I listen to a sad song – I cry – even if there are no memories attached – the lyrics resonate with me.
6. Read – absorb all information you can – the more you read the more you learn.
7. Do not be afraid to write it all down – no you are not going mad – do it. Writing it down helps so much.
8. If you have things to say to someone who ‘wronged’ you, either still with us or not, write that letter to them. You can type it, read it, put it into the sea or send it to them – whatever ‘resonates’ with you.
9. Forgiveness is key – hatred of others will only poison you – not them.
10. Share with your friends but tell them how you’re trying to get better – they will love you for that and help you.
11. Admit your ‘wrongdoings’ – you’re not perfect and it’s okay not to be.
12. Accept what is, what has happened and happened.
13. Plan positively for the future and set out your intentions. What do you want in your life?
14. Live in the moment – meditation is great for stopping that ‘monkey mind’.
15. Smile a lot.
16. Volunteer – there is always someone worse off than you and helping others will help you (but make sure you are doing it for the right reasons).
17. Stop making others ‘wrong’ to make yourself ‘right’. Who says you’re always right?
18. Learn every day from everyone – even if ‘bad’ people pass your way, you can learn from them. What lesson have you taken from that situation?
19. Shopping, drinking, having sex, they can all be fun, but don’t use them to ‘fix’ you – fix yourself before embarking on these lifestyle choices.


If you’d like to know more about me or like to have a chat, contact me today to look positively into the future for tomorrow.


With love,


Tracey B x
Lifestyle Consultant