A friend for a reason, a season or a lifetime? Here I share how to politely, and nicely, declutter your friends.
What is a friend exactly?
In these days of social media and constant ‘friend requests’ on Facebook, it would be easy to maybe misinterpret the true meaning of the word ‘friend’. I myself have been guilty of gathering thousands of ‘friends’. In fact in 2019 I had over 1,000! Most of whom I had not ever met and probably never would.
However, maybe, like me, you love people and are quite happy to have contacts all over the world, as long as everyone shares your ‘vibe’.
However, one of the things I have done in the last few years and in fact, from 2014, when my life changed, is to evaluate who truly lights me up.
A friend, to me, is someone who makes you feel really good about yourself. Someone who, you leave behind with the biggest smile on your face, or your belly aching from the laughs you have had with them.
I am SO lucky, all my friends make me feel very Light, never Dark. However, prior to 2014, I was in a rather negative place and I found myself surrounded by negative people who brought me down. Over the last years I have politely removed myself from their circle with no malice or falling out, just simply a case of we don’t see each other so much.
If, after reading this, you think “Yes” I have some friends like that, then maybe now is the time to ‘declutter’. It doesn’t mean you wish them harm or anything bad, it’s simply a case of you no longer wish to hang out with them. Maybe their beliefs or mantras for life, differ from yours. That is no reflection of you or them, it is just a fact of life.
I’ve often reflected, particularly in the last few years, on how important my friends have been to me, and the difference between an acquaintance and a true buddy.
Here is a list of what I think a friend is
A true friend is always there for you.
A true friend is genuinely interested in your life.
A true friend loves you as you are.
A true friend only wants good for you.
A true friend trusts you as you trust them.
A true friend wants you to be happy.
A true friend never criticises or judges you.
A true friend is like a comfy pair of slippers, worn around the edges but the best thing ever!
I’ve had lots of click moments since being in Dorset. I met someone recently, I spoke to her and her to me for no more than a minute. We met a week later and sat comfortably on a beach.
I guess, in summary, I would say this… friends come in many forms, they can be new and old. There are those who you share funny stories with on Facebook or those who you cry and laugh with and share intimacies and those who know nothing about you but just love to have fun and party with you. The more superficial friends, if you like, may just be a season or even a reason, so enjoy the friendship you have and take it for what it is.
As for the oldies but goodies, nurture and love them the best of all. They are indeed that pair of comfy slippers, never to be discarded!
Here’s to happy friendships!
Tracey B x